July 15, 2024

Dear Destiny Friends,

A wise man learns from his mistakes, a wiser name learns from other people’s mistakes – John Maxwell

As a progressive mind, one will continuously learn to improve himself. The only time we stop learning in life is when we give up the ghost. It is worthy of note that one of the beauties of learning is that it opens new layers and doors of opportunities, and it comes with lessons, which in turn comes with experience, that makes one mature.

One of the sad realities of life however, is that we don’t want to die, but we want to go to heaven, and so do some people who would like to succeed without making mistakes. They fail to understand that mistakes are part of life.

It’s instructive to note that when you are making mistakes, you are learning something new. I understand some people are perfectionists; they like to do things in certain ways, even if they can’t get it right hundred percent. I have news for such people; the best they can get is near perfection. Nobody’s life is perfect, except the creator of heaven and earth.

In the journey of life, everyone of us will surely experience life in one way or another. For instance, lessons and experience come to us via our career, marriage, academics, business, personal and even spiritual. Whenever life teaches you an experience, the best way to live through it is by seeing it as an experience. By doing so, you will be learning from it.

The mistake most people make is sulking whenever they have adversaries. Adversaries are not bad as some people see it. Sometimes they help to prevent bigger calamities from hurting you.

The lessons and experiences of life come to us in several ways. But one of the worst things that happen to anyone is to live in regret. Whenever you have made a mistake or life has taught you a strong lesson, don’t feel bad or regret your actions or inactions. What’s important is to learn from the experience and move on.

As a Human Capacity coach, I have had so many experiences relating with different people both younger and older people, and some of these people have one thing in common; mistakes. They recount the wrong choice and decisions they made many years ago, and it either hindered their growth or made them lose opportunities.

Let’s talk about the missed opportunities for a minute – sometimes, we meet influential people in the society or people who can assist us to get to our destination, but due to poverty mentality, bad attitude, not knowing what they want, or their inability to manage friendship and relationship, they fail to tap into the opportunities.

On a personal note, many people have reached out to me via emails, calls, messages, etc. to mentor them. The request has been so much for me to manage to the extent I have lost count. I decided to use my birthday to officially launch my free mentorship program for interested persons.

I had to put up a post during my birthday last week on all my social media requesting interested persons to state reasons they would love to be selected and mentored by me, so they will know the seriousness of what they are requesting and my time. Unfortunately, no single person reached out to me except via my WhatsApp where one person reached out. Though a friend reached out via Facebook messenger, I advised him to state his reasons via Facebook, but I’m yet to see it.

The moral here is that most of these young persons have lost valuable opportunities to learn and grow. Most of them are fine with asking for resources as opposed to learning how to fish. Well, that’s one of the lessons and experiences they will learn in life. This experience is not only applicable to young people, it has happened to older people, who have lost opportunities because of their positions on certain issues either online or in-person, lack of gratitude and appreciation, inability to build and manage valuable and strategic relationships.

Life has so many dynamic perspectives. To fully appreciate life, one must have the right mindset, understanding of life principles and skills of life. This is because principles are universal and don’t change, but methods do change.

According to Kenny Rogers, in his hit track “the gambler” “One must know how to hold them, when to fold them, when to walk away and know when to run”. I believe Kenny Rogers must have experienced life in so many ways and learnt many lessons to release this hit track that’s filled with practical wisdom. So, the ability to understand how time changes and adapt to situations will help one to adjust to life because such is life.

Some of the practical life lessons and experience one will need to know as one moves along life is that money will not solve all your problems. No matter how much one has, one will still need human beings because there are certain things money can’t buy or do for you regardless of the narrative out there about money. Sometimes, you need people because nobody can live and do life alone.

For instance, money can make you have friends who can make you laugh, money can buy you a nice bed, but it can’t give you sleep or peace of mind; money can buy you a nice home, a luxury car, provide you security, but it cannot fix a broken relationship, or cure loneliness. The “happiness”  money brings is only fleeting and not the kind that really and truly matters.

Nothing is permanent in life. No matter your situation in life, say to yourself, this too shall pass because nothing is permanent. If you have lost an opportunity, made a mistake, failed an examination etc., do not fret…just have at the back of your mind that this too shall pass as nothing is permanent.

Another great lesson about life is that people change. Nobody remains the same forever, they either change for good or bad.

Always listen to your instincts. Your instincts cannot deceive you. Your instincts are like conscience. It speaks to you in uncommon and spontaneous ways. Whenever you don’t feel good about anything, it’s advisable to reconsider your actions. According to a sage, “in doubt, do not act”.

In conclusion, one needs to reflect about life, mistakes, actions, and more importantly, the experiences they have had over time, and either learn to adjust or stand their ground irrespective of circumstances.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate and creative writer Design Your Destiny and Unleash Your Destiny.  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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